The Challenge

Photo by Madi McNair 2009

It’s time.

Time to get beyond this writer’s block I have and get this blog rolling again. 

We are fast approaching 50,000 hits (318 to go!!); we are closing in on the one year mark since Michael’s accident, and I suspect that will hold some significance (even if I am not totally sure in what ways yet); and, if I am to continue to claim that things are back to “McNair” normal, writing here, sharing our exceptional lives, continuing to document our days is important to that normalcy, for me at least.

I miss this commitment…..miss giving myself permission to come here and write down the things that are rambling around in my head (and sometimes my heart)…..miss sharing the blessing every day is for us.  So much from the last year continues to pop into my head as something I want to document, for me and for the kids, and for anyone else that might feel blessed by it.

So, with that, I am challenging myself.

A post a day for the month of April.

Something….anything…..but writing and sharing and moving onto this next stage of our lives together.

It’s time.

So bear with me. Not sure exactly how this goes, but I am committing myself to it. Please hold me accountable!!

Friendship

Not once, but twice in the last few days, I have felt the need to send a message to a friend I have neglected. They are not the only ones that deserve such a note either. I have been remiss in my duties as a friend.

We have amazing friends & family.

We knew that before last summer, and somehow you all still managed to amaze us with your hearts.

Just last week I was sharing with someone that I love going to Houston from a social standpoint, simply because we are there for a finite time and this forces me to make plans and set dates for getting together with our friends & family. I come home and in some illogical way, it seems like there is all the time in the world to get together, so those dates don’t get set, and phone calls don’t get made like they should.

What is confounding about this scenario is two fold: a) We should know better than most that we DON’T have all the time in the world, and this should lead us to action, and b) we are struggling with how we can possibly be grateful enough for this “second chance”, while ignoring the “small” things like spending time with the people that we love that can make a difference.

While we have been looking for this BIG thing we are supposed to do with this gratefulness that we feel, struggling to come to terms with it and find the meaning of it all, I am realizing that it is, and always has been, the smaller things that have made the most difference. Yes, we want to make a difference in this world. We always did. It’s just so much more profound after the events of the last year.

In some ways, that desire to figure out the “big picture” of this whole thing, has paralyzed us from seeing the moments right in front of us.

Forgive me for not seeing what is right in front of my face.

You all are such a huge blessing to us. We continue to be profoundly touched by all you have done for our family, and we are missing you all so much. It’s time for a change, time for us to start venturing back out into living and being with the people we care about. Spring has sprung and there is no time like the present!! Let's get together soon!!

Go Change the World

Text from Michael

Last month we had the “pleasure” of  driving through Plano to get to our destination.  Driving through Plano, the city Michael grew up in, means hearing stories of Michael’s childhood.  While a quaint idea in theory, the kids and I have heard most of these stories, on more than one occasion. Somehow hearing the same story for the 3^rd, 4^th or 100^th time isn’t quite as entertaining as it was the first time it was shared. Add in that our children are full fledged teenagers, with an attitude that sometimes matches that status, and there is no need to share the groaning I was hearing from the back of the van.  I think this time Abby just flat out, repeatedly, told him to please stop!!

I have to admit, I still get a kick out of some of the stories (I emphasize SOME just so my sweet husband doesn’t get the idea that I love hearing them all, over and over again or anything like that…LOL). And ever so often, I hear one I either hadn’t heard before, or had somehow forgotten. Those are often the gems of the day.

Listening to my husband share his childhood antics, there is one prevailing theme that comes to the forefront……it is AMAZING that my husband survived childhood!!! I am serious.  The close calls are many.  And I do mean MANY. Hearing several of these stories back to back on this particular trip, while at the same time still emotionally dealing with our adventures of last summer, a thought suddenly occurred to me…..

While we have been contemplating the greater purpose my husband has here on this earth to have survived last summer, the truth is, we kind of should have already KNOWN he has some greater purpose for the numerous times the dear man has cheated death in his life time!!  I mean seriously!!

As I said those words out loud, to a car full of agreement from our children (and probably Michael himself), Chance hollered up from the back of the van, “Yeah Dad, you are clearly supposed to CHANGE THE WORLD!!”.

As we laughed, and agreed, Michael grabbed his phone and asked Siri to remind him to “Change the world”.  Now, every day at 9am, his phone alarms and reminds him of his purpose here in this crazy world.

I like it.  Maybe something we ALL should remind ourselves to do as we hurry through our day trying to get it all done.  Just imagine the effect it could have!!

Life here at home has settled into a nice, normal (okay, McNair Normal) pattern.  The life we essentially put on hold last May has returned and we are all just trucking along.  We are so insanely grateful for this, while marveling that it’s even possible, and at the same time, I at least, wonder if we can possibly ever be grateful ENOUGH.

There continue to be a few “firsts” since the accident, with the latest being our first return trip to Houston for the kids to see their doctors since last April.  A trip typically made every other month, all year long, so as you can imagine, we are in serious catch up mode there (and every where else).  We had appointments from Tuesday to Friday and we were able to get 3 tests and 8 appointments taken care of on this trip.  We head back in March for another week.  The appointments resulted in some tweaks to care, but overall it was a positive visit.  More importantly, we got to see some of our friends and family while we were there, and that made the trip down awesome….as it always does.  Our Houston family took good care of us!!!

Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend and remember to……